wrestling with a tough topic

Talk about tough topics in current culture, I came across a unique one this week. Allow me to share the unfolding pattern prior to any specific perspective…

It started with a bold statement on social media.

Then, some genuine, diverse opinion was shared.

Then came some strong feelings…

Are you referring to me?? To my family??

To some, it became personal. That led to finger pointing and defensiveness…

I am actually shocked that you are not supportive… Your concern is not my fault…

And then motive was assigned to opposing opinion…

They are afraid.

Few questions were asked seeking to understand — from any supposed side. There was more an assertion of individual opinion accompanied by a disdain of perceived opposing opinion, as it seemingly evolved into an “only two-sided issue,” where only one could be right — and one had to be wrong.

Hence, with no questions, then came the actual dismissal of any validity in different opinion…

This is the way it is. Period.

As a current events observer — and only a semi-humble one at that — I paid special attention to this thread, as it was based on a subject matter of which I’m fairly ignorant. Seeking to learn from those who have broader perspectives than mine, I thought it was a great way to learn.

But I was quickly dismayed that any learning opportunity was squelched by how personal the topic was perceived, the justification of finger pointing, the absence of questions, the assignment of motive, and the rejection of any other perspective “other than mine.” There was no tolerance for perceived opposing opinion.

And so I again found myself asking…

Is there only one right angle?

Is there only one right way to think about this?

If I put myself in your shoes, would I feel exactly like you? Do the “shoes” matter?

And the great big, profound clunky question: since we believe what we believe because it is best, what happens when what I think is best is different than what you think is best?

My sense is our goal shouldn’t be to beat another into submitting to our opinion. My sense is also that we should not finger point, assign motive, and reject. In a wise society, friends, we are to respond in love. All the time. Regardless of issue.

This issue had nothing to do with kneeling, climate change, or the latest college football rankings. There was no talk of the 1st, 2nd, or any Amendment. There was also no one who invoked (good or bad) the name of the current Oval Office holder. Still, it was a subject in which admittedly, the Intramuralist knew little…

Co-ed wrestling.

“As a parent would you want your daughter to wrestle?”

“… There’s not a girls’ wrestling team… Some boys will not be able to give 100%… I think there’s a big difference between youth vs. high school…”

I wish we could have all conversations better… conversations, regardless of topic, in which we could respect one another, allow differing opinion to exist, not make it or take it personally, resist the assignment of motive, especially regarding perspectives we don’t share.

I wish we would respond in love.

Respectfully…
AR