I can\u2019t imagine what it must be like to be the father.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
You hear of the tragedy. You hear of the gruesomeness. And then you see him. You see your own son and realize he is responsible.<\/p>\n\n\n\n
What in the world are you supposed to do with that?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Your heart breaks.<\/p>\n\n\n\n You love a person so incredibly much and have to simultaneously hold the fact that he was an agent of evil. Satan got inside of him in such a warped, twisted way that he thought the taking of an innocent life was an appropriate thing to do. He didn\u2019t just think it was appropriate; he thought the killing was justified.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n How awful. How deranged. How so far off from the love and will of God.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n The older I get the more I\u2019m struck by the role of the Most High God as Father.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Let\u2019s face it\u2026 <\/p>\n\n\n\n We all have one. But let us acknowledge the reality of our individual experience, being real enough to admit that not all fathers have been trustworthy nor good. Some have been awful \u2014 abusive or authoritarian. Such can make it understandably difficult to trust dads and even men going forward. It makes it challenging to see what fathers actually should be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Fathers should be ones who generously offer simultaneous love and promise, care and protection, and encouragement and discipline.<\/p>\n\n\n\n And yet here is an earthly father \u2014 who, too, is an imperfect reflection \u2014 and he sees pics of his son on TV and elsewhere, shockingly realizing his own flesh and blood is responsible for pulling the trigger of the kill shot that ended the life of Charlie Kirk. <\/p>\n\n\n\n It matters not what Charlie believed nor what he strove for or what he encouraged. This father\u2019s son intentionally eliminated another out of hate. That, bluntly speaking, is evil.<\/p>\n\n\n\n To think of the depth of all the competing emotions that dad must have held before he picked up the phone and called another to report. I can only imagine. And then he punches in the numbers\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n What does he say?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Seriously\u2026 what does he say?<\/p>\n\n\n\n It was him. It was my son.<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n As I ponder the times I do something lesser \u2014 and call \u201clesser\u201d whatever you want \u2014 unholy, misguided, wrong, stupid, sinful, damaging, hurtful, grievous, you name it \u2014 I wonder how the great big God of the universe feels about me. How does this all work? What does faith have to do with it? \u2026 whether I have one or not?\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n Does God love me less?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n Does he want to make me pay? \u2026 really\u2026 will I pay for what I did?<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n If I\u2019m rawly transparent, those are the places we have opportunity to lean in and painfully, profoundly trust him more. God\u2019s love for us is unchanging. No matter our thought processes or behavior, no matter the good or the stupid we each do. And yes, it\u2019s true; we all do stupid. Regardless, God loves us no less. Nor no more.<\/p>\n\n\n\n That\u2019s the profound reality of the God we serve. His love for us is not based on our behavior. His love for us is based on the fact that he created us. That\u2019s enough. Hence, he<\/em> is enough. That why he implores us to find our moral code, worth and wisdom all in him.<\/p>\n\n\n\n When that father picked up the phone to share the heartbreaking, gut-wrenching reality \u2014 \u201cit was <\/em>my<\/em><\/strong> son\u201d<\/em> \u2014 that father poignantly knew that his love and and support and the coming consequences were not in competition with one another. Love and justice can be simultaneously held. Painful, yet true.<\/p>\n\n\n\n God be with the assassin\u2019s father and family. Your loving courage amidst your heartbreak is something from which each of us can learn.<\/p>\n\n\n\n Respectfully\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n AR<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":" I can\u2019t imagine what it must be like to be the father. You hear of the tragedy. You hear of the gruesomeness. And then you see him. You see your own son and realize he is responsible. What in the world are you supposed to do with that? Your heart breaks. You love a person … <\/p>\n