{"id":9949,"date":"2019-09-04T09:18:41","date_gmt":"2019-09-04T13:18:41","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/intramuralist.com\/?p=9949"},"modified":"2019-09-04T09:18:48","modified_gmt":"2019-09-04T13:18:48","slug":"the-easy-way-of-anger","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/intramuralist.com\/?p=9949","title":{"rendered":"the easy way of anger"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

[Concluding our annual Guest Writer Series is none other than PH, aka Guest Writer #12 (of 12). I have not known PH long, but I have quickly gotten to know him well. He is deep. He is thoughtful. He makes people think and makes them laugh… typically at the exact same time \u2026 ]<\/em><\/p>\n\n\n\n

* * * * *<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Don\u2019t act like you\u2019re not impressed.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

I\u2019m no stranger to being surprised at my own age and stage in life. Seems like just yesterday I was in college, feeling good, engaged, looking sexy as ever and was on top of the world. And by on top of the world I mean I was graduating then going on to grad school with zero US dollars and no job\u2026 but on top of the discovered world nonetheless. I had hopes and dreams and I was taking my first steps to accomplish them with excitement and confidence! I was about to start living my dream! Now I\u2019m in sales in an industry I never thought I would be in. I\u2019m older, still in shape (round being that shape), have a mortgage, home-improvement projects and regular maintenance, three kids, regular back pain, headaches, sinus problems, work stress, utility bills, and since my kids refuse to stop growing I\u2019m constantly buying clothes for little humans that like to ruin them on the first day. By day two my son\u2019s new shoes look like a homeless man has been wearing them for 35 years.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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It\u2019s not uncommon to get to a midpoint in life and look back wondering where the time went. On top of that, you\u2019re not where you thought you\u2019d be at this point. Perhaps you\u2019re in a job you don\u2019t like or on a career path heading somewhere you don\u2019t want! Maybe you\u2019re in a relationship that has been less than satisfying. That dream of a six-figure paycheck has come true\u2026 but you have to include the figures after the decimal point. Maybe your health has taken a turn that you didn\u2019t anticipate and you\u2019re now getting used to your \u201cnew normal.\u201d  Family, bills, mortgage, kids, life, can all be overwhelming. I love and appreciate my life, but it certainly doesn\u2019t look like I thought it would at this point.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s easy to get angry and stay angry. It\u2019s easy to settle for mediocrity. It really takes little effort. It\u2019s the easiest thing to do and yet it\u2019s the hardest thing to live with. To filter our experiences, learn from them, stay positive, and grow as a better person is difficult. It is, however, a better path. It\u2019s healthy. It\u2019s happy. It\u2019s fulfilling and rewarding. The alternative is just misery.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

We\u2019ve all met miserable people or been miserable. To constantly feel angry and bitter at life is miserable. Miserable people attract other miserable people. You\u2019ve heard it before, \u201cMisery loves company.\u201d It can be exhausting to be around miserable people and it\u2019s exhausting to be the miserable person. It\u2019s miserable reading the word \u201cmiserable\u201d that many times in this miserable paragraph! Seems like there\u2019s no relief. No peace. No end to the grief in sight.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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So young\u2026and only one chin!! (2001)

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One thing I have learned is that the fight is worth it. To put the effort in to renew your mind is never regrettable. I have never heard of a person saying, \u201cI was miserable and frustrated and I changed my outlook and focus on life, getting myself to a better place, and now I wish I hadn\u2019t. I\u2019m happy and fulfilled, and it wasn\u2019t worth the effort.\u201d No one would say that.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The hardest part is taking the first step. Choosing to no longer have the chip on your shoulder. To choose to not look over the fence at what someone else has and become envious. To choose to leave the bitterness and anger behind and look forward. To stop playing the comparison game.  To choose to forgive. To choose to let go. To choose to begin being the person you\u2019ve always wanted to be.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

You know what\u2019s funny? Many times this doesn\u2019t require a major life change. I won\u2019t be angry anymore if I get that new job. I won\u2019t be angry anymore if I find a new spouse. I won\u2019t be angry anymore if I can get my finances in better shape and live in a nicer home. I won\u2019t be angry anymore if justice is served to those who have wronged me!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When we believe that simply changing our situation or surroundings will make us happier, then we have unfortunately chosen to believe a lie. It\u2019s amazing how many times I\u2019ve said to myself, \u201cOnce I get that new TV in the basement, then I won\u2019t have to look at the old broken one and I\u2019ll feel more satisfied and content.\u201d Guess what? I was watching my 60-inch HDTV last night and I still wanted new rear speakers for the theater system. \u201cDie Hard\u201d never looked better, but there were still things I wanted. I wasn\u2019t completely satisfied with my experience. Such is life. If you think that your anger and frustration will go away or that you will find contentment by simply changing your situation, then you\u2019ll be on a lifelong journey in search of something that you\u2019ll never attain.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The hard thing about choosing to move forward from anger and bitterness is that it starts in the mirror. It requires you<\/em> to change, not your situation. It requires you to choose to move on without a guarantee that things will change. Peace, happiness, and contentment all come from inside, not outside. Joy can be found in the worst of situations because the source of joy is found within.  It\u2019s a choice and a mindset.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Being angry is easy but it\u2019s in no way worth it. Find the joy within. Seek it from something greater than your situation. Then you\u2019ll see your situation completely differently.  Perhaps your life isn\u2019t so bad. Perhaps you\u2019re right where you need to be. Perhaps this is precisely the part of the journey you\u2019re supposed to be on right now. This part won\u2019t last forever. Make the most of it. Learn, grow, and enjoy it. Maybe this is the launching point for the next big thing that you\u2019ve been dreaming of. <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Perhaps you have everything you want\u2026 you were just focusing on all the wrong things.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Enjoy the Journey\u2026
\nPH
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<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

[Concluding our annual Guest Writer Series is none other than PH, aka Guest Writer #12 (of 12). I have not known PH long, but I have quickly gotten to know him well. He is deep. He is thoughtful. He makes people think and makes them laugh… typically at the exact same time \u2026 ] * … <\/p>\n

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