Respecting all people, respecting where they are — recognizing each of us are in different places and spaces — regardless of faith perspective, many of us follow biblical teachings…
- Thou shalt not murder…
- Thou shalt not steal…
- Love your neighbor…
- Care for the poor…
- Don’t be selfish…
At the very least, we have adopted the above as wise moral measures.
In light of the current corona crud — and how it seems to have brought out the best and the worst in us, often in surprising ways in surprising people — I was struck by a new teaching this week:
“Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.”
I’ve dwelled on such before. As an advocate for respectful dialogue, if we did not practice the teaching, our integrity would be in obvious question. However, there was one embedded phrase that stood out to me this week, as I contrast the teaching with a culture which doesn’t always seem very moral and wise to me.
It wasn’t the idea of unwholesome — and I speak not of a vulgar or more coarse vocabulary. I more mean unhelpful… (I’ve said some pretty embarrassingly, unhelpful things sometimes…)
It wasn’t the idea either of saying only that which is helpful for building another up or encouraging them…
And it wasn’t still surrounding the purpose of the discipline — that our words would benefit those who hear them.
No. I was struck by the keen insight in the phrase “according to their needs.”
Stay with me here for a moment…
How often do we proclaim to another — publicly or privately — “You need to hear this!?”
How often do we aver, “I just need to say!?”
How often do those who lead or want to lead blazon, “This is for your own good!?”
How often do we hide behind our social media keyboards, insulated from the inherent wisdom of face-to-face encounters, insisting, “You don’t know what’s good for you!?”
I suppose we could thus say this a few more ways…
How often do we assume we know what’s best for another?
How often am I instead projecting my own persuasion onto him or her?
Or perhaps better said…
How often am I ignoring the wisdom that for what comes out of my mouth to actually benefit another — whether public or private — whether via my keyboard or face-to-face — even behind today’s much-worn masks — how often do I forget the wisdom that my words should be based “according to their needs”?
… in other words, not according to mine.
Just another day… thinking out loud… always desiring the pursuit of what’s wisest and best…
Respectfully…
AR