I’m thinking I won’t be venturing out on too much of a rhetorical limb here when I suggest current political discussions have become fairly difficult — at least difficult in navigating through via an interactive, respectful, honoring-of-all kind of way.
I witness such weekly within a few online groups I belong to, in which politics and various socio-economic issues are intentionally discussed.
We often struggle with respectful dialogue. We often also disagree as to why.
This week, for example, a respected friend started a conversation with the following:
“It remains amazing to me how there are millions of people that love this country and want what’s best for it. Yet somehow they are willing to simply shrug off the exploding volume of evidence…”
As the thread continued with multiple participants, it seemed amply one-sided, affirming the perspective of the conversation’s initiator. The opinions stated were also pretty strong. Please note: there is zero problem with that; many of us have strong opinions — and it’s ok to share them. There were also no insults, disparaging treatment or direct attacks, nor anyone believing it was ok to add “you idiot” at the end of their individual expression.
At one point, however, my friend asked where I was…
“AR… Nothing to say in response to the original post? Do you agree? Disagree?”
My friend sincerely wondered what I thought.
And so I chimed in…
“Your original post gave me the impression that you were starting a discussion from a point of telling everyone else how wrong they are, if they don’t have your perspective. With the far majority of persons sharing such strong opinions, that is where many of these threads seem to start… I find many of these threads not interested in interactive, varied, balanced, and respectful dialogue. Hence, it’s easier not to engage than be immediately told why I’m wrong and why there’s no validity behind my perspective.”
He then asked a brilliant question…
“As long as your mindset is as you described, and therefore you choose to avoid comment or participation, how can anyone even know what your perspective is or tell you that you are wrong?”
He was right. How can anyone know what we think if we choose not to tell them?
I added…
“That is an excellent question. And you’re right. No one can tell what my perspective is if I choose not to share it. My impression — and it may be wrong — is that most of us don’t listen long enough nor intently enough to truly understand why another person has the perspective that they do. And that’s a problem on all sides of the aisle… in Washington… on Facebook… here…”
Again, my friend sincerely wondered how I thought and desired my participation. Yet the interaction made me question the impression each of us offers to unspoken others — and how inviting we are to all. It made me wonder…
Are we allowing and promoting environments which clearly welcome diverse opinion?
Are we giving the impression that we will or will not listen intently to others?
And…
Are we limiting our own growth and perspective, by only listening intently to the likeminded?
Respectfully… always…
AR