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Posted on

reunited

And one by one, so they came…

 

Attorneys and actuaries…

Politicians and professors…

Or my sweet friend, the creative, comic book store owner…

 

Pharmacists and philanthropists…

Owners and operators…

Salesmen and stay-at-home moms…

 

Moms and dads of several, of some… adopted or none…

Single parents and parents who’ve admirably called other children “son”…

 

All races, religions, and ethnic, gender, and demographic backgrounds…

White collar, blue collar, no collar at all.

 

Last weekend was my high school reunion. What a treat it was. See if you can follow me here, from the Intramuralist’s perspective…

 

We came from various places…  Indiana, Iowa, Colorado, California, Rhode Island, Virginia, Ohio, Illinois, and more.  We are a diverse group — albeit probably not as diverse as others — but diverse in scenario… circumstance… in both obvious and non-obvious ways…

 

Some came full of joy, expectation… others, perhaps, a little anxious, wondering who they would see… how they would feel… how they would be viewed and valued after so many years.  Still others arrived with hidden heartache; some have tough circumstances at home.

 

Introverts and extroverts… there were incredible stories to share… of triumph.  Of grief.  Of sadness and success.

 

Yet regardless of story, we listened.  We cheered. We consoled and we danced. It was a joy to gather together.  It was a joy to dance.

 

It wasn’t a joy because we all act the same, believe the same, nor feel the same.  It wasn’t a joy because we’re all healthy or happy or hopelessly getting along at home.  It was a joy because our differences didn’t matter.

 

It wasn’t a substitute nor excuse.  It wasn’t a denial of truth nor an acceptance of what’s not good, not healthy, or not true.  It was a commitment to remain in relationship, no matter what.

 

Far too many seem to sacrifice community because of individual difference. Far too often the individual becomes more pronounced and celebrated than the whole. From foreign countries to the federal government, they forget far too quickly how to operate effectively and empathetically with the differences that are ever present.

 

I don’t know if my high school class could ever come close to solving the world’s growing and glaring problems.  But I can tell you this…  We’d work together, acknowledge the differences, refrain from denying truth, and always appreciate what we share.

 

We might also, just even, dance.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

a big deal

With the current Colorado flooding — p.s. the pictures are jaw-dropping — did you notice the official, early alert from the National Weather Service?

 

AREA FORECAST DISCUSSION

NATIONAL WEATHER SERVICE  DENVER/BOULDER CO

941  AM  MDT  THU  SEP  12  2013

 

UPDATE… MAJOR FLOODING/FLASH FLOODING EVENT UNDERWAY AT THIS TIME WITH BIBLICAL RAINFALL AMOUNTS REPORTED IN MANY AREAS IN/NEAR THE FOOTHILLS.  PRECIPITABLE WATER VALUES IN EXCESS OF AN INCH AND A QUARTER ON GPS SENSORS CERTAINLY SUPPORT LOTS MORE RAIN TODAY

 

Question about “biblical rainfall”?

 

I’m often intrigued how so many work so seemingly hard to omit any reality of God, Jesus, or what’s “biblical.”  I typically pause when intentional efforts are made to diminish any truth or power of Christianity.  We witness instead the so-called “wisdom” of the world…

 

The Massachusetts Supreme Judicial Court is currently deciding whether or not the Pledge of Allegiance phrase, “under God,” violates the Equal Rights Amendment of the state constitution and is an issue of discrimination.

 

A 10 year old girl at a public school in Memphis, TN was told last week that she could not identify “the Almighty” as her idol for a required school assignment.  The teacher told the young student that she could not use language that “has something to do with God.”  Michael Jackson, however, was acceptable.

 

Earlier this summer, the Samuel Adams beer company ran an ad utilizing the Declaration of Independence.  They spoke of all men being created equal and endowed with certain unalienable rights; however, they intentionally omitted the Declaration’s phrase acknowledging that those unalienable rights are endowed by our Creator.

 

Some people intentionally omit any reference to God…

… that is…

… until a “big deal” happens.

 

The flooding in Colorado is a big deal.  The resulting heartache after 9/11 was a big deal.  The shootings and violence and situation in Syria are a big deal.  In my own life, sadly at times, I’ve experienced some pretty challenging big deals.  Sometimes it takes a big deal for us to be prompted to mention God’s name… and to wrestle with the evidential reality.

 

FYI… there exist exponentially more reliable manuscripts of the Bible’s New Testament than there are of any writings of Plato, Aristotle, Caesar, and Homer.  And yet, universities across America never assert the philosophers’ writings as unreliable, questionable, or untrue.  We do not dispute that the men wrote the words.  We do not dismiss the teaching nor avoid acknowledgement.

 

Sometimes it takes a big deal for us to wrestle with what’s true.

 

So it was said by the National Weather Service this week in Colorado.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

Syria… still.

Like many of you, I watched and listened to the President’s speech on Tuesday night.

 

Also like many of you, so much of me wished to avoid it.

 

My lack of desire had nothing to do with avoiding the sobering situations on the planet.  It also had nothing to do with who was actually speaking.  My desire to avoid the President’s speech was due to the fact that even from a distant vantage point, it is clear that politics are involved.  It’s involved in the White House.  It’s involved in the Congress.  It’s involved in the pundits and reporters who boldly pounce before the microphones.  And at a time when lives and security are solemnly at stake, my earnest desire is that all decision-making would be free from politics.

 

Because of the politics, I don’t believe the public receives the entire, unfiltered truth.  With the solicited skill of professional speechwriters, our leaders’ speeches are written and re-written multiple times in attempts to best persuade… to coax instead of communicate… to convince instead of encouraging consideration… and to influence instead of inform.  The Intramuralist is well aware that we do not all agree on the same subjects nor with equivalent fervency, but my desire — especially when lives may be at stake — is that we would be allowed to make our own decisions in regard to what is right and appropriate.  There need be no manipulation.  There need be no politics.

 

So on Tuesday, our President wanted to speak to us.  If my President is speaks, I will listen.  I want to hear what he has to say.

 

You know what struck me?

 

Pres. Obama spent much of his time on television appealing to our emotion…

 

“The images from this massacre are sickening: Men, women, children lying in rows, killed by poison gas. Others foaming at the mouth, gasping for breath. A father clutching his dead children, imploring them to get up and walk. On that terrible night, the world saw in gruesome detail the terrible nature of chemical weapons, and why the overwhelming majority of humanity has declared them off-limits — a crime against humanity, and a violation of the laws of war…

 

I ask you to reconcile your belief in freedom and dignity for all people with those images of children writhing in pain, and going still on a cold hospital floor… 

 

I’d ask every member of Congress, and those of you watching at home tonight, to view those videos of the attack, and then ask: What kind of world will we live in if the United States of America sees a dictator brazenly violate international law with poison gas, and we choose to look the other way?”

 

The images Obama describes are awful.  Horrific.  Condemnation of the behavior is deserving.  However, no matter the emotion the images elicit, we cannot allow the emotion to trump the logic; logic and emotion must be equally considered.

 

Logically speaking, if we attack Syria, who will attack us?  What incident will serve as the next USS Cole, the homicide attack on our American missile destroyer, set in the Yemen sea?  What will Syria — or Iran — or any Islamic extremists — do next?

 

That’s a logical question.

 

We can’t ignore it.  We cant dismiss it.  We also can’t allow our emotions to trump it.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

Syria once more

When I was a first time parent, honest to goodness, I didn’t know what I was doing.  When my second child was born, I was a little better, but truth be told, I was by no means improved in all areas.  I’d like to tell you that child number three resulted in perfection, but no, I humbly share that such a status does not exist.

 

One of the areas in which all parents must improve is discipline.  In order for discipline to be effective, it needs to be 3 things:  logical, consistent, and timely.

 

Today’s post, friends, is actually not about parenting.  In fact, for the 3rd post in a row, the Intramuralist focuses on Syria.  Why?  Because world wars are started by singular acts.  Because so many uncontrollable variables are involved here.  Because like it or not, politics are in play on all sides of this equation.  And because the wisdom and results of military action are ambiguous.

 

Tonight Pres. Obama will interrupt prime time television to address us on Syria.  He proposes that the United States must take military action against Syria as a retaliatory response for their use of chemical weapons.  Retaliatory means to return like for like… to reciprocate… sometimes, thus — like parenting — it means to discipline.

 

Is the proposed retaliation logical?  Is bombing a logical response to the death of 1400 Syrian citizens at the hands of their own government?  Does the so-called “punishment” fit the crime?

 

Is the proposed retaliation consistent?  Thousands have died in other nations in recent years, albeit not via chemical weapons.  Are we being consistent when the means of death — as opposed to the number of deaths — serves as this metaphorical red line?

 

And timely.  Geepers.  Don’t get me started.  Let me attempt to address this respectfully via an analogy from my youth…

 

When I was a kid, we often played “Stratego,” the military strategy game where all roles and options remain hidden from the enemy until the time of attack.  While I, for one, think no president should be able to authorize military intervention without a clear majority of congressional support, I do not understand the lengthy delay of the decision.  Hence, any American response no longer seems timely.

 

A clear majority do not share the President’s desire to attack.  The most recent ABC News/Washington Post poll shows 64% of the American public oppose military intervention.  Hence, tonight’s goal is to persuade us that military intervention, regardless of logic, consistency, and timeliness is necessary.

 

Perhaps instead of any persuasive rhetoric, Obama could borrow from the unfiltered responses after yesterday’s slate of initial NFL games.  In fact, I’m thinking I’d prefer all politicians were a little more unfiltered.  Obama could indeed open with or include some of yesterday’s actual quotes…

 

“First off, it wasn’t a very smart play.”

“There were a lot of question marks…  are the plays going to work?”  

“I’m disappointed in myself. This loss is on me.”

“This is just one step in the right direction.”

“It wasn’t the easiest, but I’m not a person to make excuses.”

“Obviously, it wasn’t perfect.  And there’s a lot of things we can do better.”

“We’ve got a lot of work to do.  We need to understand that.  We need to stick together and persevere.”

“We’ve got to go back and look and see exactly what they did and how they took us out of what we wanted to do on offense.”

“It’s not the way we drew it up.  We’re all going to learn from this.  There’s no reason to point any fingers.”

 

From NFL to parenting to military intervention, we must embrace logic, consistency, and timeliness.  Being unfiltered, also, often helps.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

incapable

Before we converse today, let’s lay a bit of groundwork…

 

  • While multiple factors contributed to its onset, World War I began after the assassination of the heir presumptive to the Austro-Hungarian throne, Archduke Franz Ferdinand, and his wife, Sophie, by a Yugoslav nationalist.

 

  • World War II started after Poland was invaded by Germany — under the leadership of Adolf Hitler — and Great Britain and France decided to respond.

 

In other words, world wars began with singular acts.  Yes, other factors were involved and undoubtedly led to the climactic onset, but singular acts provided the spark through which wars of the world were both prompted and justified.

 

Did the men/women involved foresee the major, military consequences?

Did they know it all?

Smart as they may or may not have been, were they capable of predicting the massive extent of global devastation that resulted from singular acts?

 

Friends, I am not “anti-war” nor “pro-war.”  I’m not exactly certain how any could be either; there’s a time for everything — for every activity under the sun… a time to be born and a time to die… a time to be silent and a time to speak… a time for war and a time for peace.  And just as both Pres. Bush said last week and Pres. Obama said yesterday, using military force is one of the most grueling decisions any president or nation has to make.  The ramifications are sobering.  In instances such as above, the ramifications meant World War 1 and 2.

 

How does the potential beginning of World War 3 affect your thoughts regarding bombing Syria today?

 

As I watch our leaders contemplate an attack (and as I continue to cringe at the politics in play and the “running for cover” by far too many in Washington — the deflecting of blame, the voting of “present,” etc.), I wonder how many are considering the ramifications of a singular event.

 

They say it will be limited.  They say it will be done in 90 days.  They say there will be “no boots on the ground.”  They thus say that any lives lost will be few.

 

Here’s my zillion dollar question:  how can they predict exactly what will happen?

 

Were those involved in the initial ongoings of World Wars 1 and 2 able to predict all that would happen?  Of course not.

 

One of the aspects I find most troubling about our current American leadership is that they keep telling us exactly what will happen when in my opinion, they are not capable of making such a prediction.  It’s not that they aren’t smart men and women.  Many of them are incredibly smart.  But sometimes I question their wisdom (not their intelligence, but their wisdom) because they don’t possess the capability to predict all that they tell us they do.  So much of what our leaders say seems designed to persuade us, as opposed to sharing actual, honest, and entire truth.

 

The entire truth means the acknowledgement that all things cannot be predicted.  They are incapable of being predicted.  If the United States chooses to bomb Syria — regardless of the continued rhetorical promises outside of their control — what are they missing?  What can they not foresee?  What’s incapable of being predicted?

 

We don’t know…  and we don’t know what we don’t know.  We don’t know what singular act could prompt a third world war.  And that should add a humble, sobering pause to any affirmative vote.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

serious questions

In case you were unaware, the Intramuralist has at times been quite specific about the love of grammar.  In fact — hands down — my favorite punctuation mark is the question.  Asking questions.  I love it.

 

To ask a question implies humility.  It’s the only punctuation mark that invites a response.  And unless only asking to hear oneself think — and yes, I am making the almighty assumption that the asker actually listens to the answer — to ask means to acknowledge that we don’t have all the answers.

 

Friends, the situation in Syria is serious.  If you aren’t paying attention, I would strongly encourage you to quickly take note.  The situation is intense and evolving, and the potential consequences and results from both action and inaction are ambiguous at best.  Hence, the Intramuralist has many questions.  Why?  Because we don’t have all the answers.

 

One caveat prior to the asking…

Military conflict is not a partisan issue.  There should be no politics involved.  While “shame on you” is a phrase not in my vernacular, if there was a place for the consideration of employment, it would undoubtedly be here.

 

Hence, the questions…

 

What’s new that has led to this level of seriousness?  This conflict has been ongoing since 2011.  According to the latest estimates by the United Nations, more than 70,000 Syrians have died.  Why consider getting involved now?

 

Syrian Pres. Bashar al-Assad has led Syria since 2000, succeeding his deceased father, who was president for 30 years.  What is Assad’s agenda?  Are any of his motives hidden?  What are they?

 

What role do Islamic extremists play?  The terrorist group, Hezbollah, has supported Assad’s government, while the Associated Press has been reporting that a primary rebel group in Syria has pledged allegiance to the terrorist group, al-Qaeda.  Are we aligning with terrorists?  Whose side are we on?  Whose side should we be on?

 

We must therefore extend our questions to address American involvement.  Pres. Obama is advocating interference due to the believed use of chemical weapons.  Pres. Bush advocated involvement after the believed existence of chemical weapons.  Let me ask now:  where did Syria actually obtain their chemical weapons?

 

Should America be involved in the civil war of another?  Is that our job?  Is that our role?    Are we capable of being effective?  And if we aren’t certain it’s effective, should we even entertain the role?

 

Attacking anyone will cost us millions.  Billions.  Maybe more.  We are a country that is continuously spending more than we take in.  Few others in the world have affirmed an attack and committed to support any military intervention.  That means the role is ours; the lead is ours; and the expense is ours.  And the reality is that the cost may mean more than money; it may mean military lives.  Is that too much to pay?

 

Is it America’s calling to be the world’s police?  Was it right under Pres. Bush?  Is it right under Pres. Obama?  Is it ever right?

 

Friends, I have a lot of questions.  I don’t have a lot of answers.  We must acknowledge we don’t have all the answers.  The situation in Syria is serious indeed.

 

Respectfully,

AR

Posted on

baaaaaaaaack

In the words of one infamous, fairly muscular Arnold, “I’m baaaaaackkkk!”

And I’m thrilled and psyched to be here!

Friends, what a joy it’s been…

 

First allow me to affirm our excellent guest writers…

They offered insight and opinion that was spoken from their point of view.  Please note… I have never avowed that my perspective or point of view is always right.  I have never opined that my way is the right way nor my thoughts, the right thoughts.  But I have sworn that if any opinion is not respectfully stated, both the opinion and opinion’s holder lose significant credibility.

 

Thank you, writers and loyal readers, for participating during this time.  You spur me — and others — on.

 

Nonetheless, so much has happened.

 

From Syria to sequester’s impact to seasonal summer events, we have witnessed much.  In the past month, the Intramuralist has also toured Boston, NYC, the shore and the shows.  My family has travelled the East Coast.  I have observed and reflected on much, watching people, interacting with many, witnessing both pitfalls and potential, and being both encouraged and challenged.  I want to fire you up! 🙂

 

Hence…

 

I have so much to say.

(…shocking…)

 

Going to war.  Attacking Syria.  What’s our role?  Is it necessary and/or effective for the United States to be the world’s so-called “police”?  What are the long term ramifications?  What’s the cost?  Is it appropriate for us to be the avengers of wrong?

 

When does international law apply?  Does international law apply without willing submission?

 

Congressional recess.  (They sure seem out a lot.)

 

Blurred lines.  Blurred with or without Miley Cyrus.  Blurred lines that have nothing to do with music.

 

Obamacare.  What’s happening with that?  Are you watching?  Is it all good?  Could we admit what’s good? … and what’s not?

 

Cost.  Too high a cost on far too many things.

 

The Little League World Series. The importance of little league.  The importance of play.  Have we forgotten how to play?

 

What about smiles?  Have you seen how few smile on our city subways?  We look down.  Look smug.  Avoid eye contact at all costs.  Why do so many — so many even of us — avoid eye contact?

 

Family.  Loving them.  No matter what.  (No matter what.)  Blood.  Water.  Thickness.

 

Having life figured out.  Not.

 

Balanced opinion. Learning from others.  Learning from the expression of opinion that’s different than ours. Those clever guest writers.  From beats to baseball and family bartenders… from parenting to privacy and uncanny prophecy.  Sitting still long enough to listen and hear what they say.

 

Summer. Yes, summer.  It was grand.

 

There is much to say in the days ahead, friends.  There is also much to learn.

 

Respectfully… always… (and so psyched to be back…)

AR

Posted on

blurred lines

[Note:  this post was penned prior to last week’s provocative, public dance by Miley Cyrus. In other words, the lines were already blurry.]

 

Everybody get up!

 

I’m up. I’m dancing like any good un-retired disco queen of the late ’70’s. I love, love, love the beat of this song. It’s being called the song of the summer by media. I’ve watched the Robin Thicke/Jimmy Fallon version of Blurred Lines on YouTube an embarrassing number of times. This version uses school instruments and has a PG-rated solo. It’s a super fun vibe. The band is smiling, jamming, rocking, kidding around and having a terrific time. Then I read the original lyrics on several popular lyric websites.

 

Hey, hey, hey. 

 

Prude would never be a word used to describe me. Each day less and less things make my chin drop. But some of those lyrics… oh, my! Now I know this isn’t the first rap song to use offensive (to me) words but it’s the first nasty rap I really have fun listening to. I want to buy it so bad.

 

You know you want it.

 

There exists controversy over whether or not the song is “misogynistic” or “rapey”, and when I read the words rapper TI sings, I wonder who really resonates with this sex slang. Why does any song any where in any language need to say what he says? This is where I get really confused. And then there is the original music video with nude dancers. They chose to do a remake on that one. Wonder why?

 

If you can’t hear what I’m trying to say. 

 

Why add the obscene? Life can be sad and hard and even cruel all on its own. Why throw more violence and crass images into the universe? But I love the bounce of this song. Perfect for car dancing but I don’t have it on  my iphone because I can’t justify some really bad lyrics in part of the song.

 

Maybe I’m out of my mind.

 

This isn’t about nasty rap; it’s about me trying to convince myself that if the beat is good, I can overlook the really negative message of the words. There is a disconnect with the fun loving, smiling men wearing wedding rings, everything-is-alright-then group singing this terrifically fun song. I actually had that argument in my head. They all look too nice and happy for it to be wrong!

 

Can’t let it get past me.

 

So now I wonder how many other things I excuse the nasty because I like the beat? Books, movies, TV shows, gossip, certain friendships, idle thoughts. Apparently I have selective vision, only focusing on the good and fun stuff when the obscene side is right there as well. It’s just a song, right? No big deal. What’s the real harm in buying the tune and ingraining the lyrics in my head?

 

Maybe I’m going deaf.

 

After 50 plus years I can recognize the little voice that whispers “good choice/bad choice. Sometimes I listen to the voice and sometimes I conveniently ignore it. This time I’m hearing the old adage, “garbage in, garbage out.” I combat that one in my head with “don’t throw the baby out with the bath water.” I really, really  like this song…sort of.

 

I hate these blurred lines.

 

Respectfully,

CB

Posted on

state of the race

I am white.  I don’t like being labelled white or even Caucasian. But because I’m in the race majority for the time being (though this is supposed to change sometime in the next fifteen years and whites will be in the minority), I carry a burden. In the U.S. we still have never made it past the race issue.  When my forbears came to this country in the early 1900’s, they were labeled dumb Pollacks. That wasn’t nice; the Polish worked hard, taking menial labor in the coal mines and working three jobs to make life easier for their children.

 

This is where I get upset.  I’m trying to be respectful since I am a guest of AR. I don’t understand why black people (and hey, I have two half black nephews, so I am not racist) are frequently changing what white people are supposed to call them. Colored? Not anymore. African American? The label du jour. But I know a lot of black people who are not from Africa and they resent the label. Asians don’t seem to be too upset about being called…. Asian.  Native Americans used to be Indians, but I don’t get the same sense of them having a chip on their shoulder about being or being called Native Americans.  Hispanics?  They deal with their label, too.

 

Where am I going with this? Well, as a white person, I wonder why African Americans have their own television network and awards program. When whites become the minority in the U.S. — and in 2012 white babies born in the U.S were in the minority, and whites are projected to be in the minority by 2043 — I don’t think we will have the white equivalent of the NAACP. I don’t foresee whites getting that coveted college scholarship or reduction in tuition because they will be the minority. The Hispanics do have their own TV shows, but I don’t see them pushing their agenda, which is equality, I think. Maybe superiority?  I don’t know.

 

Because, if you ask me, we are all equal.  All races.  We now have a black president.  I never voted based on race, so the black president thing isn’t about Obama being half white and half black. But a lot of people make it about that very thing.  Which then diminishes the equality of the situation.

 

I didn’t like when Obama chimed in about the George Zimmerman trial saying Trayvon was an African American (true) killed by a white person (not true). Zimmerman is half Hispanic. There they go again, making it about race. It isn’t. If I see a white teen walking around with his hoodie pulled up, a part of me becomes watchful. He could be any color and my guard might go up. To me, this was not about race.  But some made it about race… again.

 

One more thing.  If black people ever say they want reparations for their ancestors being slaves, I am opting out.  I didn’t have a slave. My ancestors didn’t have slaves either. They were dirt poor, eking out an existence in Eastern Europe.  Which is why they made the trip to America. If anything, I want reparations for my ancestors being labeled dumb and being treated like dirt. That hurts me that my forebears were labeled and treated poorly by other people’s ancestors in America.

 

See where this leads? To craziness. Race is not an issue anymore.  Black people are afforded the same opportunities as any other race in America.  We all have to work hard and grasp for that brass ring if we want to make it here. So please, stop talking about race and start exerting your energies toward making your world better. But if we’re going to continue this tedious discussion about race and what different races need and demand, then you need to call me what I am.  An Eastern European American.

Here’s to not having to check a box on forms stating our race. Here’s to equality for all.

 

Thanks for listening.

 

Respectfully,

DEE

Posted on

scars

When my daughter was barely 2 yrs old, she took off at her best toddling speed on an unfortunately gravelly path.  Before her grandmother could catch her, she had tumbled face forward.  Shaken to see her innocent face smeared with blood, dirt & tears, I was quickly summoned.  As I held her to assess the damage, her little hands tried to rub away the pain of an open gash between her upper lip & her nose.

 

Too eager to play to get fully cleaned up from dinner before the frolicking began, reflex now sent her hands to the wound, grimy with dirt and remains of spaghetti sauce.

 

Other than not being able to prevent this pain in the first place, the most difficult thing for me was having to gently pry her little hands away from the injury.  I tried to explain as best I could in two year old terms that we needed to clean the wound & not to hurt it more.  I secured her arms as she bravely allowed the nurse to disinfect the area & apply a “butterfly” bandage.  Tears finally stalled when she saw her face with the butterfly “mustache” in the mirror.  Amused, she smiled at herself, which stretched at the gap above her lip, re-activating the pain, beginning the crying & hand restraint all over again.

 

As difficult as that was, I sensed God speaking to me & showing me a lesson in it.

Like a download of understanding, I could sense His compassion toward me, toward us, His kids.  I saw how I had been the child, hurting & trying with my own inadequate hands to fix my pain, often exposing myself to more injury & infection.  Less trusting than my daughter had been, I had even flailed out, hurting others in my attempts to “help” myself.

 

I saw His constraining love as a parent. Suddenly I could appreciate the necessity of Him asking of me what I might be too limited to comprehend in this earthly realm; to trust Him in the process beyond my natural impulse to fix things according to my own understanding.

 

Born this side of heaven while made for glorious eternity, life can seem unfair.  My biggest battles seem to be curbing my childish attempts to manage my own impulses… anger, selfishness, envy, pride, lust, gluttony… Thankfully, even through the pain I have caused myself & others, His longsuffering nature still beckons me to return my focus to Him.  The more times I opt to be still, look to Him, & wait to see Him work, His healing comes to my body & soul.  His purposes become more & more clear.

 

A dozen years later after the incident, my daughter is left with little more than a small scar that I see as a “beauty mark” above her lip.  This & many other scars in my own life remind me of the understanding I received in those moments, the message He has now, several times over, written on me.  I am getting more used to being still & allowing Him to comfort & secure me.  He has cleaned & dressed many wounds in me, & drawn my sight to a higher place from which to see the healing taking place, to see Him work.  I am beginning to see His reflection, a new creation, the new me! …With some beautiful scars, & stories of healing to tell…

 

Respectfully,

RMH