an honest conversation about Bud Light, Target & more

J: OK, let me say it right from the get-go. This is hard.

K: I know. People don’t do this well. There aren’t many safe places to speak. 

J: Not just to speak, but to honestly explore what we think. I feel like if you say one wrong thing, people will be immediately offended, like “you’re not allowed to even think that!”

K: Right. Like “you even thinking that is evil or immoral or damaging.”

J: And they’re shouting… always shouting.

K: True. The societal shouting is pretty exhausting.  

J: So knowing this is a safe place, where all thoughts, discussion and exploration are welcome, can we talk? Really talk? I’m hesitant to go here, but I need help. The conversation keeps changing. What current culture deems as good and right and true keeps changing. I can’t keep up with it!

K: Agreed. We keep moving the bar, goalposts, whatever you want to call it. But, of course, here is a respectful place to exchange ideas and listen to one another, regardless of where we come from and what we believe.

J: Thanks. Can we talk about LGBTQ+ — the movement, the definitions, even this whole Bud Light, Target, Twitter documentary thing — whatever that is? I keep trying to learn from the media, but I also feel whatever side I’m listening to that they’re not attempting to encourage any critical thinking; they’re just trying to encourage me to think like them.

K: Oh, the media. They’re pretty impure. I think they hurt more than they help. In recent years I’ve come to believe they actually try to divide us. Maybe it’s a ratings thing.

J: Or maybe they just broadcast what they want, dressing up their opinions and offering it as news. Scary. But I think we, too, often fall prey to listening to media outlets that only confirm what we already think.

K: Amen to that! And that is doing damage to our entire culture.

J: So back to this LGBTQ+ thing. And it’s not really about the “L,” “G” or “B.” I know “L” stands for “lesbian” or same-sex attracted women; “G” stands for “gay,” which now primarily refers to same-sex attracted men, and “B” for “bisexual,” persons who are attracted to both sexes. I understand all that. I have tons of LGB friends — and love them dearly! But I’ve been sincerely struggling with the “T,” the concept of transgender, referring to a person who was biologically born male or female but now desires to be the other. I really mean no disrespect — please! I simply have honest-to-goodness questions about what I believe — and not many places will let us talk about it. 

K: I get it. And then the whole Bud Light and Target thing brought it all to the forefront.

J: Right! Bud Light sponsored a trans woman or biological male on Instagram, and Target started selling a kids swimsuit promoting “tuck-friendly construction” with “extra crotch coverage.” Then I hear of a protest, and I’m sitting here not wanting to be disrespectful or offensive to anyone, but I don’t know how to feel! It’s so confusing!

K: Indeed. Share with me a little more here. And let me be sure to emphasize this — I think you said it, too — but it’s important to be respectful and compassionate to all involved. There are many affected by this issue that struggle with various mental and spiritual health issues, and we want to be sure not to add to that. It goes back to what you said from the start; this is hard.

J: I guess I feel like the “T” doesn’t really fit with the “L,” “G” and “B.” Again, I really do mean no disrespect. I’m just trying to logically wrap my brain around this. LGB still recognize their biological makeup. “T” doesn’t do that. Their identification is subjective, believing we can be who or what we identify as, as if we can just decide; it contradicts the divine truth of being created uniquely male and female. Again, I’m not shouting. I’m just one who craves and embraces the truth; truth has never been relative. So it was one thing for me when advocates suggested we just want freedom. No one’s rights should be denied. But somewhere along the way…

K: Somewhere along the way Bud Light and Target and other corporations came in

J: Yes. They keep pushing the envelope too far, meaning farther than what’s true. For Target, for example, to put that swimsuit in the kids section means kids will see it. It’s as if Target wants to teach my kids that gender is somehow malleable. That doesn’t make sense. And holding that opinion — and this is why it’s so hard to discuss — doesn’t make me “anti-trans.” I absolutely value the freedom and value of all people. Rather, it makes me a believer in biological and biblical truth.

K: You’re not alone in your questioning. There are increasingly more angles that the majority of our country sincerely wrestles with. We need to be able to have healthy, respectful, non-shouting conversations about what is true and what is not. Especially, for example, this idea of sexual-changing surgery as a minor. This is tough! I feel for the one who struggles with this. I care deeply, too, for my many friends who are the parents of these dear kids. I also struggle with the idea that a person that young knows what’s best for the entire rest course of their life. I certainly didn’t.

J: Oh, and look at all the adult confusion… 

K: Ah, like when Lia Thomas took center stage in the the NCAA swimming competition.

J: Right. A man competes against men one year. The very next year against women. He goes from 554th to 5th place in one event and 65th to 1st in another. That doesn’t take any kind of science to discern that DNA made the difference. An award was then taken away from women, both straight and lesbian women. 

K: FYI — Lia plans to swim at the 2024 Summer Olympic trials.

J: Yikes. When places of women are taken, when their rights are violated, this gets even harder.

K: Yes. The bar or the goalposts are certainly being attempted to be moved. My sense is persons are attempting to move from acceptance of a thing to celebration of that thing.

J: And there’s a huge difference between the two, especially because of truth. Truth and grace, as I say, always given at the same time. And generously. Always generously.

K: Wow. Yes. This is hard.

J: No doubt. [Insert deep breath here.] Thanks for talking.

K:Thank you. Thanks for being honest and vulnerable… although I don’t know that we solved anything.

J: No, but at least we found a safe place to talk.


J&K for AR