My current sense is this will not be a very popular post. Sorry. It’s never my intent to alarm or offend; it is, however, my desire to handle all topics honestly — regardless of controversy — and to handle them well.
I’ve been watching. (Surprise, surprise.) We learn much from watching; we learn more from listening and observing than from hearing our own selves speak. But I’ve recently been watching and have thus concluded that we are a society of “selective carers.” Many will push back on that — perhaps the most compassionate among us — but even the most compassionate have that place in their rear view mirror that serves as a significant blind spot. Each of us is a “selective carer.”
We don’t truly care about all things… we don’t truly care about all people.
Yes, I hear the rants and raves. I hear the noble, contradictory proclamations. And truthfully, it’s probably more an issue of empathy than of caring. We don’t empathize truly well until the experience directly affects us…
We don’t care about the sick… until someone we know is sick.
We don’t care about the poor… unless someone we know is poor.
We don’t care about HIV/AIDS research… until someone we know tests positive for HIV.
We don’t care about gun control… until someone we know is shot and killed.
We don’t care about unemployment… until someone we know loses their job.
After the rousing “right on’s” from those of us immediate to empathize, let’s continue…
We don’t care about extracting money from the wealthy… unless someone we know is wealthy.
We don’t care about Obamacare causing many to lose their insurance… until someone we know has lost theirs and must now pay more.
We don’t care about entitlement abuse… unless we know someone who is receiving unemployment benefits but making no effort to look for a job.
In other words, we selectively care. We typically only best care for “one side of an equation.” Pick your issue. Pick your person. Even to the most compassionate among us: do we only care about who or what we’ve determined to be the biggest victim or injustice?
Let’s try further examples… do we care so much about pro-life, that we forget about the young woman actually wrestling with the decision? … do we care so much about the woman, that we forget about the babe inside of her? Do we care so much about LGBT activism, that we forget about the good people who sincerely believe it’s immoral? … do we care so much about the lifestyle being immoral, that we forget about the good people in that community? What about race? … do we care so much about one race, we forget about another?
Do we remember only the poor but not the wealthy? … only the sick and not the healthy? Do we… selectively care?
Friends, I am not saying that we cannot be passionate about one issue or side. I am simply stating that sometimes in our passion we glaringly omit empathy for another. We quit caring about other sides and situations that affect us less. We are more numb to the news.
On Tuesday of this past week, a 23 year old gunman shot and killed his fellow teaching assistant on the campus of Purdue University in West Lafayette, Indiana. Purdue is my respected and beloved alma mater… a place with people I know. While I have always been sobered by the acts of violence at every institution, this one hurt a little more. I pray for all those affected… for the students, for the family of the 21 year old who died… and for the man who pulled the trigger and for his family. I pray for wisdom for each of them… for peace to those whose lives were seemingly shattered… for repentance for the gunman… for justice and mercy… and for wisdom for all to know what is good and right and true.
I care.
Respectfully,
AR