As I empathized with many, watching my beloved alma mater be included in the unfortunate list of first round tournament upsets over the weekend, I wrestled with the timeless mantra of this being somehow “just a game”… “It’s just a game,” we like to say.
Right… so that’s supposed to make me feel better?
I’m not sure I believe that it really is “just a game” — and I say that not solely as one whose wadded up bracket is currently occupying space in the closest trash can. I mean, by definition — basketball, football, soccer, you name it — they are each games — show choir, band, gymnastics, etc. They are each a form of play or sport, played according to a certain set of rules.
But consistent with my frequent assertion, often articulated relevant to a specific post — that “this is not a sports post” — sports are where we learn so many valuable lessons far beyond the game idea…
… realizing the benefit of hard work…
… comprehending how hard work pays off over time…
… knowing the necessary investment in ongoing training…
… seeing the beauty of discipline…
… seeing the beauty of perseverance…
… recognizing the need for emotional control…
… keeping emotions from overtaking us and making poor choices…
… channeling our emotions into something good…
… not over-reacting to a given moment in time…
… recognizing that one “up” or one “down” is only a snapshot in time; it’s not the whole picture…
… grasping the concept of team…
… grasping the beauty of team…
… learning compassion and empathy for teammates…
… acquiring genuine respect for the opposition…
… acknowledging how solid competition spurs us on…
… and never seeing self as better and best…
… simply wanting to improve…
… simply wanting to grow…
I think better said than “it’s just a game” is that sports are an arena in which we have that opportunity to grow. But an opportunity is only an opportunity if and when we seize it.
When we refuse to seize the opportunity — when we attempt to simply brush it off a loss with the convenient “it’s just a game” mentality — I wonder whether that causes us to focus only on the outcome, instead recognizing all of the above listed benefits.
I think of the NCAA tournament, now headed to next week’s slate of games that are advertised as nothing less than “sweet.” The reality of the NCAA men’s basketball tournament is that while 68 teams are included, 67 of those 68 will lose their last game. Should those 67 then walk off with their heads held in paralyzing despair? There is certainly room for disappointment — especially when not executing ability to one’s furthest extent; and that disappointment can drive us to improve and achieve. But there is also room for growth, if we recognize the contest actually is far more than any game. The idea is to not get so caught up in only the wins and losses.
Sometimes I think we encourage evaluation of the outcome only, as if such is the only measure of success. We miss the benefits in how the game is prepared for and played.
Perhaps then, the “just a game” idea is more said to make us one time hopefuls — those with the wadded up brackets — feel better after a disappointing loss. Maybe it’s said to soften the blow. After all, how many times is the “just a game” mantra mentioned after a rousing, spectacular win?
No, it’s not just a game.
Respectfully…
AR