So it’s true… over the weekend was my birthday. Not the birthday of the Intramuralist (which, by the way shall turn 8 in November — which we will excitedly speak of then!), but my own date of birth.
A fascinating phenomena took place, no less…
Via cards, calls, texts, tweets, emails and Facebook wall posts, I was able to speak with several of you. That means a lot to me.
Years ago I can remember thinking something along the lines of… My time with each person on this Earth is limited… I want to make the most of every opportunity — maximize each moment… so whether at the salad bar in the grocery or sitting in those sweet and sweaty baseball stands, my desire is to utilize my God-given gifts to listen to and encourage whoever else may be there…
Maybe it’s the result of the strong, enduring influence by my parents and grandparents — including a wise preacher, teacher, and bartender. But every interaction is important to me. My desire is to encourage and sharpen well.
I thought about what I might wish for on my birthday… if I could wish anything…
Dream with me, if you will…
I want us to get along.
Call me sappy, sentimental, wishy-washy, you-name-it, but it’s my birthday; I get to choose what I want.
I’m truthfully not too keen on the idea — in this messy, messy world — that we can all somehow get along utilizing some of the more Band-Aid-like mantras — like, “let’s agree to disagree.” No, that doesn’t cut it for me. You see, the reality of the agree-to-disagree idea is that in the back of our minds, we know there’s still something we can’t talk about… You be there and I’ll be here, and we will never ever discuss that because I can’t stand the way you feel (… Hear the immediate “grrrrr” succeeding that thought…).
Hence, I don’t believe the agree-to-disagree mentality is a successful approach to our desire to somehow all get along.
So since it’s my birthday — or it at least was — let me share with you what I most want…
I want us to get along… by… respecting… where each of us currently is.
That’s it. We keep fighting. We keep speaking past each other. Our leaders keep speaking past each other. They and many of the current candidates seem to think the best way to solve the problems is to criticize and drown out the opposition, thinking solution only comes by winning more people to our so-called side. I don’t believe that. I mean, my sense, is if you trounce me to get what you want, I will lose respect for you in the process. That’s not unity; that’s a unified facade.
I want us to respect where another is by allowing for the so-called evolution of opinion. While no doubt some have arguably used said terminology for perceived political expediency, I admit: some of my opinions have evolved through the years. Some things have become more important to me; some have become lesser. But what’s so damning and damaging to our livelihood and unity is that we give no freedom for a person to evolve. We demand that they “feel like me now” (!!) — and when they don’t, we look down on them as if they are either ignorant, stupid, or something judgmentally worse.
Where is the freedom to evolve?
To me, that’s respect… recognizing that we’re not all on the same page at the same time and being ok with that.
That’s what I want.
(Yes, Happy Birthday.)
Respectfully… always…
AR