Today is one of those days when my planned post was totally scrapped. I had written about the events in Charleston. I had written about the horrific hate crime and how heartbreaking it is to witness the intentional end to innocent life…
I acknowledged how as a nation we react. Our collective reaction was actually bittersweetly beautiful after 9/11… for even though still in shock, together we were determined to triumph amidst the ashes; hope and perseverance trumped all evil that took down the towers. I then talked about evil in my post…
My troubling observation was that while I understand the passion that wishes to ensure events like Charleston never happen again, I keep thinking we’re missing the bigger point; something’s off in us. I just don’t sense the underlying problem in regard to what happened in Charleston is gun control; it’s not about guns. It’s also not about racism. It’s about evil. It’s about evil manifest as racism and hatred.
I realize such is not a popular point. It’s ok. I get it. All of us want this violence to stop, and my sense is that such is the intention of the social media and microphone screamers (we all know who they are). It’s just that if we fail to wrestle with the bigger, underlying problem, we will stop and solve very little. That’s what my previously planned post was about.
And then last night, along with several hundred others, I went to a community vigil honoring Cincinnati police officer Sonny Kim.
On Friday morning, Kim responded to a 911 call of a man acting erratically in the streets. We would later learn that the call came from the erratically-acting man. He set the situation up, and before the call, he texted friends that he wanted to die at the hands of police. Before he then received his fatal wish, he first shot and killed Kim, who was first on the scene. Sonny Kim was a 27 year, decorated, respected veteran of the Cincinnati police force. He was the so-called “best” of the “best.”
In Charleston, a white man intentionally killed nine black men and women. In Cincinnati, a black man intentionally killed a man born in South Korea. The two 21 year olds were both motivated by evil.
At the vigil for Kim, the father of a good friend of my two oldest boys, significant emotion was rampant. But none of the reactions were divisive. There was no shouting; there was no screaming; there was nothing self-serving; and there was no pointing of fingers even at the one who committed the obvious, heinous wrong. In fact, one police officer who spoke boldly amidst his tears said, “It doesn’t always make sense. You can’t figure everything out.”
And I felt him saying, too (via my liberal paraphrase), “Don’t spend your time and energy trying to figure this senseless evil out. Instead, come together. Come together as one,” he said. “Humble yourselves, honoring Officer Kim in how you live and love one another now. Submit to God. It’s the only way life makes sense. When you submit to God, you will find the unity that moves us forward in a healthy and wise way.”
It was a bittersweet, beautiful night.
Today in Charleston, South Carolina, members of the historic Emanuel AME Church will reconvene in worship. They will acknowledge senseless evil exists on this planet, some things hurt more than ever imagined, and that God is still in control and worthy of our relationship and submission. For those who heard the victims’ families speak last week, we witnessed that beautiful, unified, tear-laced submission.
It’s tough. It’s also beautiful when we have the wisdom and humility to actually come together.
Respectfully… with a heavy heart…
AR
I am so sorry to hear about the loss of Officer Kim. How terrible and senseless. There is a mental health crisis in our country. The laws are such that there is no way to help those who need it most and who’s condition prevents them from knowing they need help. There are not enough beds for those who know they need it. Until we figure this out the stories like the two you highlight here will multiply. These people need our help, and our compassion. I know that is not the popular thing to say. It is easier to condemn and to categorize them but they need help that is beyond them to seek out. I was lucky, my mentally ill cousin only killed himself, but what I wouldn’t give now for a law that would have forced him to stay in a mental health unit until they could get him the help he needed.
So love and respect your heart, sister…
AR, You speak from your impassioned heart but you allow the rage you feel deep inside, to come out in such a powerful expression that you not only express your feelings, beliefs and your stance regarding these heinous acts but also challenge the rest of us to look deeply into our very souls and closely examine how do I feel about the acts of this last week.
My tendencies have been to blame the Police force (predominantly where I live they are white) that seems to go out of its way to kill black men. When our school system decided the schools were either mostly black or mostly white, we decided to “bus for integration.” So most of our teachers (white) were sent to teach in the inner city. So what happens next – each school had 2 officers (white) and the canine units were there as well. Anything to protect the white teachers. This was Louisville, Ky. Most people murdered by “The Almighty Police” were predominantly black. And only when there were riots did we see both black and white kids being evil. I am currently in Russellville, Ky. (About an hour from Nashville) This town reeks of Racism. My 87 year old mother, looking mighty fine, went to play Bridge today and one woman asked her “how far did you chase that n_____ to get that jacket.” I grew up in this. I was raised to hate black people. They had separate bathrooms and drinking fountains. What an inexplicable and heinous way to raise a child. Thank God that He came into my life and showed me that we are all His children. Thank God for Rosa Parks. Thank God that Martin Luther King had a dream. Thank God for the daily interactions I see and take part in of blacks and whites having very tight friendships. Thank God for Lauren Brantley, my dearest and closest friend.
So how do I react to the cold blooded murder of Officer Kim? To the deranged white man who murdered fathers, sons and brothers? My husband’s response would be to lie prostate on the floor and beg God’s forgiveness for not going far enough to end the evil that some call free will. I would be on the floor next to him, crying out for mercy for all the things I should have done differently. God will be not be patient forever.
Wow… excellent comment, also, Elaine…