speaking at my funeral

Do you ever wonder what people will say about you at your funeral? No, I am not talking about the “she looks good”, or the “they did an amazing job” comments. I am talking about the real heartfelt comments that will come from your family or your friends — and hopefully not anytime soon. Have you done enough “good” in your life so that those chosen to speak will leave a lasting impression on those in attendance?

I watched the funeral of Officer Sonny Kim in Cincinnati last July and listened to the speakers and what they each had to say about him. How difficult it must have been for each of them to prepare their remarks because his death was so sudden, so senseless, and so tragic. Yet, Officer Kim created quite a legacy and left plenty of content simply by the way he lived his life.

If you, like me, didn’t have the good fortune to know Officer Kim in life, take the opportunity to know him in death. We can learn from his example and try to leave this community and city better than when we arrived. Make something positive happen from this tragedy.

No doubt, Officer Kim was an amazing husband, father, son, brother, mentor, teacher, and police officer. No doubt, Officer Kim touched and positively influenced many lives. No doubt, Officer Kim lived each day to the fullest. And no doubt, Officer Kim died a true hero.

In death, Officer Kim almost seems larger than life, a super hero, an immortal. In theory, it is fine for us to remember him in this way. We should. He deserves it. But in reality, he didn’t possess any super powers any more than you or I do. He loved. He cared. He displayed a genuine kindness to his fellow man. He was special. He made a difference. And he will be remembered.

Officer Kim didn’t make a conscious effort to make this world better; he did it by simply living his life. He didn’t care what race you were or what religion you practiced or how much money you had; he simply loved and cared about everyone collectively. Those that knew him, loved him. And those that didn’t know him, have come to love him in the days following his death. This has been very evident in the endless tributes and donations that have come flooding in.

If Officer Kim were here today, I would imagine that he would shy away from all of this attention. I say this only because his beautiful wife, Jessica, was quoted as saying, “you are doing too much” in response to all of the love and support shown to them in the days following his death. No, Mrs. Kim, we can never do enough to thank you and your family for sharing your Sonny with us — not only in life but in his death, as well.

He united us on a sunny, then, briefly stormy Friday afternoon in June. We were all Cincinnatians, Ohioans, and most of all Americans. We were supporters of the hundreds of law enforcement members who were a part of his funeral procession. We lined 17 miles of the city’s Montgomery Road with our American Flags, wearing our blue. It didn’t matter race or religion. It didn’t matter young or old. It didn’t matter rich or poor. We were there to honor Officer Kim and his family. We were one.

So, I ask you…what are you doing to make a difference? Do you go the extra mile? Do you take the time to enjoy the little things and/or little ones in your life? Do you go out of your way to do something nice for someone? Are you kind? Are you compassionate? Do you love? Do you care? Do you live — and I mean really live?

We all would like to think we would answer yes to all of the questions. I believe we would all choose good over bad at any point. But, if you are like me, we are constantly running by the seat of our pants. We have games and concerts and work and household matters. We have family obligations and school meetings and dinner to cook. It is hard to manage our time these days.

I challenge you to start small and do one thing each day to make this world a better place. Maybe just smile at someone, lend a hand, send a card, offer a hug, or take the time to tell someone how much they mean to you. It doesn’t have to be monumental, the smallest showings sometimes are the most memorable.

So, think again about who you would want to speak at your funeral. What do you want them to say? Reflect on this often. Start creating your content today. Be kind, be gracious, love all, care, forgive and forget, don’t judge, and laugh. Above all, go make a difference today.

Kindly…
LS